Are you tired of complaining about the same things I’ve rand over again? Tired of ruining your family dinners and parties because your significant other decided to be an ass? Maybe you should try these tactics to help you stop getting into arguments.

Start with your faults

Recurring arguments form a pattern. It’s easy to dwell on your partner’s faults and not recognize how distant you’ve become. Before you start pointing fingers, ask yourself if you’ve been fair and just all the time. More often that not, you’lol find that you have some adjusting to do. These faults will help you understand your partner’s perspective better.

Create boundaries for arguments

The difference between arguments that end a relationship and those that make it better are safe, healthy boundaries.

No matter how angry you are, there are some things that you shouldn’t do. For example, you shouldn’t hit your partner or bring up particularly sensitive topics.

Talk to your partner about creating boundaries within arguments, like keeping your family out of it, banging doors, breaking plates etc.

Don’t be on the defensive

While you hash it out with your partner, allow room for vulnerability. Don’t be afraid to admit that you were wrong about a notion you had before the argument.

Always staying on the defensive and projecting yourself as never entirely wrong won’t help your relationship grow.

Check if you’re transferring aggression

Before walking up to your partner, review your day and fish for any triggers that may have made you angry. Many times, you’re not actually angry at them, you just had a rough day at work.

Be careful with your phrasing and tone

Maybe it’s not what you’re saying, but how you’re saying it. If you still value your partner, try to correct them in a constructive tone, not a condescending one.